We're Back from Hibernation.....Roanoke Times Comic Strips Dialogue (2 of 4)

This is our first entry since September of last year, and the only reason we have come back is that there is a loyal blog reader in Riga, Latvia, who kept pestering me about when I would blog again. Ok, so actually Instagram is to blame....all those amazing photos of Lake Van in Turkey are hard to ignore!!! It's hard to believe that in that amount of time we have watched Vladimir Putin became the 45th president of our beloved America (Sorry, but we can't stand Donald Trump, if there was definitely a God, then Hillary Clinton would have won the election...excuse the editorial)

Here are eight lines of dialogue we are stealing from the "Roanoke Times" Sunday comics section which ran on March 5, 2016. The reason we are using an image of starting Washington Capitals goalie Braden Holtby (pictured) is because a hockey goalie is referenced in "For Better or For Worse."

1) That stupid goalie! He just never looks! He misses everything! (For Better or For Worse)

2) "I think I need a hug anyway," (Zits)

3) What do you mean? (Hi and Lois)

4) I know red flowers make me sneeze. (Pickles)

5) At long last...............The Baby Aisle! (Jump Start)

6) I was just leaving for the day (Dilbert)

7) You're going to be late! (Baby Blues)

8) Chef Salad! Lasagna! Fried Chicken! (Blondie)

Now we can finally devote more time to those Mental Floss pop culture quizzes!

http://www.nhl.com

http://www.roanoke.com

http://www.gocomics.com

http://www.mentalfloss.com

Potluck Quote of the Day (9 of 10): Dorothy Parker

It has been three full days since Dorothy Parker (1895-1967) would have celebrated her 123rd birthday, and we were planning to quote her before the anniversary. We gather Zeynep Akili of Istanbul, Turkey is a huge fan of her work (this is an in-joke, Zeynep Akili is not a real person)

One can probably find her books in places like The Regulator Bookshop in Durham, NC, which is hosting humorist/author Dave Barry on Sept. 7th, Malaprop's Bookstore (note to self: don't forget the apostrophe) in Asheville, NC, or The Boulder Bookstore in Boulder, Colo.

Parker was also the focus of a recent article in "Mental Floss" magazine.

Here is her quote, on love:

"Now I know the things I know and I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!"

http://www.mentalfloss.com

http://www.malaprops.com/

http://www.regulatorbookshop.com/

http://www.boulderbookstore.net/

10 for 10 (10th entry): Three Hip Urban Slang Defintions............Defining Hottish with Tori Spelling

Greetings to our blog readers in the Netherlands, Argentina, and Burkina Faso....

We will be the first to admit that we should be at the gym in a yoga class or in a public library reading "Esquire," "Mental Floss," or "The Atlantic." But, we are here, and this will mark the 10th and final entry for a series commemorating the tenth anniversary of our blogging practice, which started on Sept. 21, 2005.

Today, we are going with three definition from The Urban Dictionary which have been slightly altered.

Tori Spelling, the former "Beverly Hills 90210" (original show) actress, is pictured here because she is the first woman who came to mind when we heard the term 'hottish.' The second woman who came to mind was Florence Henderson from "The Brady Bunch" (original version). And, the third choice was Sarah Palin (now, we are swimming over our heads).

To find out what that word and the other two urban slang words/terms of the day just keep reading, Angry Birds will be waiting for you when you are finished here:

1) Hottish: Somewhat hot. Although cannot be considered as 'hot,' a person who is hottish is not completely ugly either. (Our apologies to Ms. Spelling)....

2) Donald Trump: Living proof that money simply can not buy good hair.

3) More Issues Than Vogue:  When you imply that your amount of issues (personal problems) are greater than the amount of issues of Vogue (the magazine).

http://www.urbandictionary.com

Little Thinker Quotes (12 of 16): We're Not Afraid of Virginia Woolf.

"You cannot find peace in by avoiding life."

Ironically, this is a quote from Virginia Woolf, who alas committed suicide.

SIDEBAR: According to "Mental Floss" magazine, at some point and place in time, people used to say: "It's colder than a brass toilet seat in the Yukon."

With that in mind, here are some look at temperatures across America and around the world:

48 degrees in Sochi, Russia

37 degrees in Greensboro, NC

37 degrees in Bergen, Norway

29 degrees in Portland, Maine

21 degrees in Kars, Turkey

14 degrees in Port Huron, Michigan

http://www.mentalfloss.com

http://www.virginiawoolfsociety.co.uk

Presidential Quotes (11 of 16): Rutherford B. Hayes, a Forgotten Man

If one takes the Mental Floss "Name All 43 Presidents Quiz," we have a feeling Rutherford B. Hayes, a one-term Republican president from Delaware, Ohio, might be one of the half-dozen a person would forget.

Hayes (1822-93; president from 1877-1881), did have a better fate than his successor, President James Garfield, who was the second of four American presidents to be assasinated.

Here is a quote from Hayes, which those of us who are capital punishment opponents can identify with:

"One of the tests of the civilization of people is the treatment of its criminals."

http://www.miller.org/president/hayes

http://www.vadp.org (Virginians for Alternatives to the Death Penalty)*

Both the Miller Center and the VADP are based in Charlottesville, Va.

http://www.mentalfloss.com

Presidential Quotes (6 of 16): Franklin Pierce, the Only President from New Hampshire

Greetings to our blog-readers in Canada, The Bahamas and Peru.

When one plays the "Name All the Presidents" trivia game on the web site for "Mental Floss" magazine, President Franklin Pierce, the 14th president and the only to hail from the Granite State, New Hampshire, may be one of the names one is most likely to forget.

But, Pierce, who served in office from 1853-57, was able to overcome the tea party radicals of his day, and defeat the conservative Whig Party candidate Winfield Scott by a 50-44 margin. Pierce's veep was William King, from Alabama, who alas died of tuberculosis a mere 45 days after becoming vice president.

Here is his quote: "Frequently the more trifling the subject, the more animated and protracted the discussion."

http://www.millercenter.org/presidents/pierce

http://www.mentalfloss.com

http://www.visitnh.org

Before We Take a Week Off: Top 10 Embarrasing Ways to Die

Greetings to our friends in the Netherlands, Turkey and Mexico.

We went back and forth on this, but we decided it would provide relief from a subject matter that makes sitting through episodes of "Six Feet Under" difficult to sit through. Speaking of which if actor Michael C. Hall has time on his hands and visits this blog, we just have to ask: "What the expletive are you gonna do after 'Dexter'"? Hopefully, those of you in Utrecht, Gaziantep and Puebla got the joke (those are cities in Holland, Turkey and Mexico).

Here we go with the Top 10 Most Embarrassing Ways to Die:

1. Drowning while fishing in the New River in West Virginia.

2. Choking on a Pay Day candy bar.

3. Trying to take a photo of Gustave the man-eating crocodile while vacationing in Burundi (We heard about him through "Mental Floss" magazine)

4. Tripping into an on-coming DC Metro subway train (a DC-Metro map is our middle image)

5. Getting hit in the head by a foul ball at a Detroit Tigers baseball game.

6. Getting hit by an on-coming car after shopping at K-Mart.

7. Smoke inhalation from smoking Camels in bed.

8. Getting struck by lightning while trying to fix satellite tv.

9. Getting run over by your very own car or truck (Alas, this did actually happen to a mail carrier in Charlotte, NC)

10. Slipping on a banana peel

http://www.wvtourism.com

http://www.vistwv.com

http://www.wmata.com (DC Metro web site)

http://www.goturkey.com

http://www.mentalfloss.com

For a link on our sister blog about 10 more embarrassing ways to die:

http://www.politicscultureandotherwastesoft.blogspot.com

Highlights from The Bucket List: Going to Seattle Anyone?

Yes, even though I'm only 43 years old, I actually made a bucket list of 100 things to do before I die. Some things are a bit more idealistic; some things are a bit more practical.

With that, I want to send special greetings to our blog-readers in Russia, China and Japan as well as those of you in smaller countries like Malta and El Salvador.

Here are some of the highlights:

1. Take a Greyhound bus trip from Burlington, NC, to Seattle.

2. Go to Iceland, and take some photos of the volcanoes while you are there.

3. Watch "Breaking Bad" on dvd in its entirety (I have yet to see a single show of the series which concludes this weekend).

4. Write an article for "Mental Floss."

5. Wake up at 6 a.m. for six days in a row?! (I'm a night person)

6. Take a Varan bus trip (Varan is a Turkish bus line) from Istanbul to Van

7. Date a woman 20 years younger than you

8. Date a woman 20 years older than you

9. Visit the National Zoo in Washington, DC, take lots of photos of the pandas

10. Volunteer at a homeless shelter

http://www.greyhound.com

http://www.visiticeland.com

http://www.turkey.org

http://www.mentalfloss.com

http://www.washington.org

http://www.homelessshetlerdirectory.org

Presidential Quotes (8 of 8): John Quincy Adams

We finally wrap up our quotes from American presidents with an ironic quip from John Quincy Adams, the sixth American president. JQA was also the son of John Adams, America's second president.

Here it is:

"America does not go abroad in search of monsters to destroy."

He might thus favor the controversial foreign policy stand of America not taking excessive military action in Syria.

With that, we want to congratulate France and Uruguay for reaching the FIFA Under-20 World Cup final is Istanbul, Turkey, on Saturday, and Iraq and Ghana for their out-standing runs during the championship.

You can always learn more about JQA by reading "Mental Floss" magazine, or at least checking out their web site: http://www.mentalfloss.com

SIDEBAR: Our favorite tweet of the night is from Jake Fogelnest, a writer/comedian: "Please don't retweet my tweets. A lot of people that follow you are real dummies and I have to hear from them. Thank you."

http://www.jakeofgelnest.com

Greetings from Mister Frog

Even though none of us are biology majors here at "The Daily Vampire," we were startled to learn that frogs are not reptiles, but rather amphibians; we were thus unsure if we should include them as part of Reptile Week or not.

But, the frog lobby in Washington, D.C., lead by Cong. Clarence G. Burton (D-Va)*, made us decide that frogs deserved a blog entry of their own, so here it is.

The image here is of a poison dart frog, commonly found in Costa Rica as well as other Central American countries as well as South American countries, like Peru and Bolivia.

The poison dart frog is known for its bright-colored body. According to Wikipedia, most of these creatures are endangered species, and they live in tropical rain forests.

The Saint Louis Zoo is one American zoo which has an abundance of frogs, though we're not sure which types of frogs they have. We'll have to ask Javier the Intern** when he clocks in tomorrow morning.

And, greetings to those of you in Karachi, Pakistan, where we gather it is between 9:30 a.m.-10:00 a.m., according to "Mental Floss," this is the time of the highest Internet traffic during the day, at least during the week. Of course, we should ask "Wired," a monthly technology magazine if their indirect competitors are accurate, but Javier is overwhelmed right now, especially since we're not paying him.

SIDEBAR: We were hoping to cover more women's college volleyball this year than we have, but we did get a chance to watch the women's volleyball game between the University of North Carolina and Virginia Tech live from Chapel Hill, NC, over the Internet at a Denny's (thanks for the good wi fi, Denny's).

Though it was a fairly competitive game, the home team Tarheels (we have also seen them referred to as the Tar Heels, but we have enough headaches right now) won in straight sets 3-0 (25-20, 25-22, 25-21). UNC's standout player Emily McGee, a senior from Naperville, Illinois, guided the 'Heels with 15 digs and 11 kills.

For the visiting Hokies, Samantha Gostling, a junior from Charlotte, NC, had 11 kills.

UNC hosts the University of Virginia for Senior Night on Saturday, while the Hokies head down the road from Chapel Hill to Raleigh to face North Carolina State.

Here are the other ACC women's vollyeball scores from Friday night; the home team is marked with a # sign.

#Georgia Tech 3 Wake Forest 0

#Miami (Fla.) 3 Boston College 0

#Clemson 3 Duke 2 (more on this game on our other blog: http://www.politicscultureandotherwastesoft.blogspot.com

#Florida State 3 Maryland 0

http://www.goheels.com

http://www.stlzoo.com

http://www.costaricanfrogs.com

http://www.thisiscostarica.com

*-Cong. Clarence G. Burton was an actual Democratic congressman from Virginia, but he died at age 91 or 92 back in 1982. We figured using a dead member of The Hill would cause us fewer problems.

**-Javier the Intern is a fictional character, though he has been a running gag on this blog for quite a while now.

Reptile Week Cont'd_ The Alligators

Yesterday, we started with the turtles. We forgot to mention that the Minnesota-based folk/rock band Trampled By Turtles will be performing in Buffalo, NY, at the Town Ballroom and The Port City Music Hall in Portland, Maine, on Dec. 2, in addition to their show at the Newport Music Hall in Columbus, Ohio. The band plays many other days in the northeast during that interval as well.

For those of you in North Carolina, my good friend folk singer Bruce Piephoff will play at the Southern Lights Bistro in his hometown of Greensboro, NC, on Nov. 29 and Dec. 4; I'm not sure if he has ever written a song about reptiles.


Today, we continue with the mighty alligator, which can be found from North Carolina to Florida here in United States. Initially, we were going to post an entry for crocodiles, which were the subject of a kitschy, but catchy Elton John song "Crocodile Rock."

But, we couldn't find a good image of Gustave, the notorious man-eating croc in the central African nation of Burundi to use. Gustave, who has reportedly devoured some 300 people, perhaps some of whom were photographers, was mentioned in a "Mental Floss" article about Burundi within the last year.

That same magazine said that 9:30 a.m. was the best time to post blog entries. It's actually 9:30 p.m. here on the east coast, but it is that time in Beijing, China, right now.  Perhaps, it's that time in Hong Kong too.

The Crocodiles are also the nickname of the Turkish soccer team Bursaspor, located in Bursa, Turkey, in western Turkey; the city is Turkey's fourth largest. This weekend the Crocs' tied Istanbul powerhouse Besiktash 3-3. I suppose taking photographs of the game is less risky than sneaking up on Gustave.

As for alligators, if one is in St. Augustine, Fla.,  then one can visit the St. Augustine Alligator Farm in St. Augustine, which is open from 1:00-5:00 p.m.

http://www.trampledbyturtles.com

http://www.brucepiephoff.net

http://www.southernlightsbistro.com

http://www.mentalfloss.com

http://www.alligatorfarm.us

http://www.bursaspor.net (In Turkish)

10 People Who Will Decide Who Becomes Prez (1 of 10): Rock and Roller in Seatlle Suburb

Name: Steve Nichols

Age: 48

Reisdency: Bellevue, Washington.

Job: Rock and Roll Guitar Player

Will Likely Vote: Obama

***_Notice: please see disclaimers at the end of this entry


The suburban vote will be crucial for both President Barack Obama and his challenger Mitt Romney. Center-right political pundit David Brooks said (if our recollection is accurate) that the shift in the politics of suburbs in places like Philadelphia, Seattle and Raleigh were ones which enable Obama to win over John McCain in 2008.

Washington state has voted for Democrats in every election since 1992 and even though there are Republican strong-holds in places like Spokane, Yakima and Everett, we expect that Obama will carry the state again this year.

Bellevue, Washington, right across the lake from Seattle, is actually considered one of the best places to live in America, according to Wikipedia. The 2010 Census indicated that the 98006 zip code had a population of 122, 363, and the town was on the boom until the economic recession of 2008.

Among its famous citizens are Ann and Nancy Wilson who formed the band Heart; they objected to the use of their song "Baricuda" at the 2008 Republican Convention.

Bellevue is sister cities with Yao, Japan, and three other cities around the globe.

DISCLAIMER: Steve Nichols is a fictional character, though there are at least two relatively famous people with that name including an American soap opera actor and an American car design engineer.

The image is actually of guitar player/producer Mark Hermann who has played for the likes of Foreigner and Joe Walsh. We have no idea what his age, residential area and politics are.

SIDEBAR: Pigs swimming in the Bahamas?! Yes, there is a hysterical short piece in the current issue of "Mental Floss" about these creatures. They were apparently left by a fleet for a barbecue, which never occured.  Of course, this might hurt the magazine's circulation in Karachi, Pakistan!

There is also a wonderful photo on the search engine bing.com of multi-colored buckets in the African nation of Burkina Faso.

And, lastly, we noticed that we had a hit from Algeria today....we are quite impressed that you were able to discover us!


http://www.bellevuereporter.com/

http://www.mentalfloss.com/

http://www.bing.com/

Top 10 List- Obscure World Capitals, Africa Edition

We learned from the ever-hip magazine "Mental Floss" last year, that apparently a man-eating crocodile named Gustave (not the one pictured here) resides in native habitiat somewhere in the central eastern country of Burundi.

That country shares a border with Rwanda, which we learned from the BBC, is trying to re-establish from its very dark recent history to bring tourists in for bird-watching. Apparently, Rwanda is indeed one of the best places for bird-watching in the world.


And, both Zambia and Gabon have been in the news as Zambia pulled a huge upset over Ivory Coast to win the African Cup of nations in Gabon. To make matters even more confusing, there is also an African country called Gambia which is pretty far from Zambia.

Put, at any rate, here are a list of ten African countries that most 11th graders at Franklin County High School in Rocky Mount, Va., (hey, we had to pick on some school) probably couldn't locate on the map. But we still wish the FCHS Eagles' basketball team bonne chance this year.


1. Banjul, Gambia (western Africa)

2. Libreville, Gabon (central Africa)

3. Lusaka, Zambia (east Africa)

4. Kigali, Rwanda (east Africa)

5. Lome, Togo (west Africa)

6. Maputo, Mozambique (east Africa)

7. Bujumbra, Burundi (east Africa)

8. Gaborone, Botswana (southern Africa)

9. Antananariuo, Madagascar (southern Africa)

10. Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso (western Africa)

Yes, should numberrs 9 or 10 be asked as a Final Jeopardy question, our thoughts would be with the contestants.

And, on a more somber note, many countries in Africa, including Somalia and Burkina Faso, are currently expeirencing crippling famines.

CARE is one of many relief agencies working to resolve this horrific problem.

Quote of the Day- Mike Schmidt

Today, I thought I would go with two baseball legends who were stars when I was avidly watching baseball as a little boy (I actually rarely watch baseball now!).

Back in 1980, when I was ten years old, Mike Schmidt helped lead the Philadelphia Phillies to a World Series championship by defeating the Kansas City Royals, a team that was once a perenial power.

Schmidt, now 61, is from Dayton, Ohio, and he graduated from Fairview High School. He played for the Phillies his entire career from 1972 until 1989. The third-baseman was a 12-time All-Star, and he was named National League MVP in 1980, 1981 and 1986.

Here is his quote:

"I could ask the Phillies to keep me on to add to my statistics, but my love for the game won't let me do that."

SIDEBAR: I was able to name all 43 of the American presidents (Barack Obama is actually classified as the 44th president because Grover Cleveland served two separate terms) in 4:47 on mentalfloss.com

It was actually my seventh or eighth try at achieving this. The last president who came to mind was Chester Arthur, the 21 president who was also a Republican. In case you are wondering, the new movie "Arthur" nor the original 1981 Dudley Moore film it's based upon have anything to do with President Arthur!

Status Update_ Today, I Learned About Blue Lobsters

Of course, when one mentions the word lobster, you either think of an overrated American chain restaurant (Red Lobster), Maine or the '80s New Wave band from Athens, Ga., the B-52s (pictured here).

But, until I read a story in the current issue of "Mental Floss" by Adam K. Raymond, I was not fully aware of blue lobsters. According to Raymond, one in every four million lobsters are blue. They are this color because of a gentic defect.

We tried to get a picture of a blue lobster up here, but they were quite difficult to hotlink.

If one wants to learn more about lobsters in general, I highly recommend Trevor Corson's excellent 2004 book "The Secret Life of Lobsters." Corson also wrote "The Story of Sushi."

Within a few days, we are hoping to let you know how far apart Portland, Maine, is from Altoona, Pa., in case you really, really want to know!

Beers of the World (#45)- Chang Beer from Thailand

Today, we are featuring world beers that we learned about through a Beer Geography Quiz that we took on mentalfloss.com on both of our blogs; I got a 100 on the quiz---when I took for a second time!

Chang Beer (chang is the Thai word for elephnat) is a relatively new beer from Thailand which has quickly displaced rival beer Singha, the oldest beer in the country, as the popular brand domestically. Chang Beer not only maintains 60 percent of the Thai market, it has also been available in the USA since 2007.

SIDEBAR: We want to congratulate WKNC (88.1 FM-Raleigh), the student-run college radio station for North Carolina State University for qualifying for the top 10 in the MTVu College Radio Woodie Awards contest, which are given to the best college radio stations in the country. The station has a real cool speed metal show on Friday nights between 10 p.m.-midnight, which has helped introduce me to bands like Slipknot, which are admitedly not going to be on any NPR station I regularly listen to anytime soon!

Status Update_ I'm Getting Hungry Here

First of all, our apologies to our friends in Karachi and Islamabad for forgetting to put Pakistan in our links section yesterday as we mentioned a uniquely named coffee place in that country yesterday, but we forgot to link them. Of course, all of the blame goes to Javier the intern.


As for my status update for 1/27: "I am as hungry as Gustave the man-eating crocodile."

"Mental Floss" has a great story in the current article about the central African country of Burundi where one can find Gustave, a 65-year-old croc who has reportedly eaten 300 people. Perhaps, he now qualifies for the senior citizens discount at Denny's!

While researching this piece, we found out that the T-Bone Steak House in Phoenix offers up a 24-ounce t-bone for $27, while our vegan friends in New York (actually, we don't have any vegan friends in New York that we know of, according to Javier) can go to Blossom on 187 9th Avenue. The establishment was voted the best vegetarian place to eat in 2008 and 2009 by "Time Out New York."

I'm not sure if it's going to be a t-bone or a tofu burger, but I need to get some food!

NOTE: The crocodile in the photo is NOT Gustave, but I'd advise against taking his close-up.